Shades of Love Hurt and Healing

The Story We Don’t Have a Name For

Sometimes, things happen to us that we just don’t have the words for.

You live through it, and it’s only much later that you realize something was wrong. I’ve been thinking a lot about situations where the truth is hidden—where someone uses deception to get what they want. In the moment, you think you’re consenting to one thing, but because you were lied to, the reality is something else entirely.

I’m talking about sexual abuse by deception.

I want to be clear: I’m not talking about every little lie people tell in relationships. I’m talking about a deep, intentional betrayal that changes the entire nature of the experience.

When you find out the truth later, the confusion is overwhelming. You start questioning everything. You ask yourself, “How did I let this happen?” or “Was any of it real?”

That confusion sticks to you.

The problem is that our society doesn’t really have a legal definition for this yet. Because there isn’t a “label” that everyone agrees on, it’s easy for people to dismiss it. They tell you it wasn’t that bad, or it “doesn’t count.”

But the emotional impact is just as real as any other violation.

When we stay silent, we start to think we’re crazy. We doubt our own eyes and ears. We stay stuck because we don’t have the tools to understand why we feel so broken.

I am done staying silent.

I’m not here to be a judge or a lawyer. I’m here to be honest. If you are feeling confused, hurt, or used, I want you to know that your feelings are valid. Even if the law doesn’t have a name for it yet, your experience happened. It was real.

Healing doesn’t start when you find a perfect legal answer. It starts when you finally give yourself permission to say: “This hurt me, and I deserve to understand why.”

We might not have all the definitions yet, but we have our voices. And when we stop hiding, we start waking people up.

Shades of Love, Hurt and Healing

In my book, I go deeper into the moments I couldn’t speak about then. I talk about the betrayal, the twin flame confusion, and the long road of learning to trust my own truth when the world (and the men in it) tried to tell me a different story.

If you’ve ever felt like your story was being erased or silenced, I hope you’ll follow along as I write mine. Because once we put our truth on paper, it can never be forgotten.

This is my story.